I have often dreamed
Of a far-off place
Where a great warm welcome
Will be waiting for me
Where the crowds will cheer
When they see my face
And a voice keeps saying
This is where I'm meant to be

I will find my way
I can go the distance
I'll be there someday
If I can be strong
I know ev'ry mild
Will be worth my while
I would go most anywhere
to feel like I belong

Beep beep.

it was 10:00 pm. the sound of my mobile ringing. i reached it and open the lid. on the screen blipped a date, showing 2nd June, a birthday.

well i know i never have remembered any of my friend's birthdays, i need the help of myspace or mobiles to remind me. but when i am reminded, i do really wish they live a long and nice life. so this is just an advanced happy birthday to my friend.

Happy birthday and may god bless you. miss you buddy.

I was young then and stupid.



I had no experience about all that. I didn't knew what i was dealing with. Me and you, we were. At first it was fun but then more problems started to emerge. Suspicions started to unearth. You didn't believe in me and I was getting tired of your distrust. From what started as innocent letter writings to becoming late night calls. We grew intimate and then we grew apart. You accuse me of having more than one while I watch and let you have more than one. I was young then and stupid, so I decided to stop by silence. Everything changed and we went our own ways.



But sometimes i do miss you.

I remember.


I was the supporting character, although my role was not that important but it was important to me. I was the "official assistant to the Sultan". it was fun. it was at camp when i did that performance with my group during culture night. Everybody laughed including me. it was the first time i felt so excited with entertaining people. it was when i realized that i felt happy making people laugh and smile.



well now i'm just bent on making my life a misery.

I have a dream.


as my friends and i are talking, one of them said,

Friend: I'm concerned, Azuan are you sick? You look so bone-y.

Azuan: *smile from ear to ear and resume discussing the topic at hand.


like i said, i have a dream. i try to achieve it.

Blog: what makes your problems more important than other poeple's?

Azuan: well, it's because they're mine.











i'm having a less productive day here. i need to get out of my home. i need some culture.

I really hate school. ahaha they're making me hate the holidays. look what my plans are for this holiday. emmm school, study, work, homework and of course tuition. i hate the holidays. can i just slit my wrist, at least that'll be more fun.

I am a self absorbed, self-centered, narcissistic, egotistical person. thank you very much.

anyone know any cure for depression cause i'm in a rut. a very big gigantic magnanimous rut. i have lots of agendas here. i need a heart a brain and some courage. maybe i just need one of them ruby slippers. and i'll be on my way following the yellow brick road. i'm off to see the wizard, the wonderful wizard of oz.

Oh darling, please believe me
i'll never do you no harm
believe me when i tell you
i'll never do you no harm.

oh darling, if you leave me
i'll never make it alone
believe me when i beg you
don't ever leave me alone

when you told me, you didn't need me anymore
well you know i nearly broke down and cried
when you told me, you didin't need me anymore
well you know i nearly fell down and die.

oh darling please believe me
i'll never let you down
believe me when i tell you
i'll never do you no harm.