Thats my name, don't wear it out.

I'm a pessimistic optimist.

That's what i really am.

So from what i understand, pessimists are negative people and optimist are the opposite.

Well i'm both.

For example, i doubt that this relationship will last long but wishes it to stay longer.

Ya dig?

What's the difference?

For a long time have i pondered the possibilities.

Too long a time have i wondered what the difference and still i have not come to any conclusion. I just needed to know the answer.

As a last resort, i turn to you, my belog reader. Can you help me in lifting this burden on me, answering the question too old than the mountains?

Question:

What is the difference between a slap and a bitchslap?
What about a punch and a fuckerpunch?

Is it because those bitchslap are only done by bitches and those fuckerpunches are only done by fuckers?

Or is it because they actually have special powers like bitching and fucking, for instance?

So if i were to fuckerpunch another person, would it implement me on being a fucker?(although it is not a bad title)

So these are the questions that lingers in my head now and again. Anybody willing to give me a detailed and clear explanation is welcomed to do so. Anyone else who just wants to do the opposite, well may you be bitchslapped and fuckerpunched by those worthy of their name.

Hello, i'm the coolest nerd you'll ever meet!

(i got that one-liner from a friends' profile, thank you very much.)

Okay, this post counts as a tag. I got tagged from someone who smells like poetry. I'm only doing the "what is your favourite picture part", because suka-fucking-hati aku lah. AHAHAHA. That is now, officially, my favourite line, too.

So, while other kids pride themselves on trying to become cool and famous. While other kids want to be the IT girl and IT boy. While other kids follow the new trends and styles.

I on the other hand, can't stop on trying to become a nerd.

Amacam? Ada ala-ala nerd tak?


p/s: mungkin kamu tidak perasan, tetapi dalam gambar di atas, seluar itu sudah ditarik ke atas pusat. Bagaikan aku pakai g-string, i got a wedgie, ok! All this for becoming a nerd? Urgh.

Deja voodoo.

Have you ever experienced deja vu?

Well, me neither but what i'm experiencing now, for me, it is somewhat like deja vu.

Right now, i miss the Wonder Years and Roswell.

Yes, those are just television series. But somehow i miss them so much that it hurts.

And the problem is, i've never watched them. I mean i have watched them a few times in brief moments when flipping through channels. But the truth is, i never really talked myself into watching them and committing myself into liking them.

And again, somehow i miss them so much, and i feel like i have watched them my whole life, eventhough i know i haven't.

Do i make sense?

I mean, which one should i believe?


What i know or what i feel?

The art of war.

Ada pernah sekali aku jumpa buku, kalau tidak silap aku, tertera pada cover dia, title buku itu adalah The Art Of War. Tetapi aku tak ambil dan baca sinopsis, maka aku tidak tahu lah apa isi kandungan buku itu dan aku tidak mahu "judge a book by it's cover".

Dan tadi semasa aku belek-belek saluran televisyen(sebenarnya ayah aku yang membelek, aku tengok sahaja) ada ternampak satu saluran namanya The Art Of War juga. Tetapi tidak sempat untuk menontonnya kerana ayah aku semangat nak tengok cerita hindustan( whatever, ok). Lantaran aku masih lagi tidak mahu buat apa-apa konklusi.

Tetapi tiba-tiba sahaja terlintas di fikiran aku lah.

"If war is an art, then those people who start them must be some motherfucking artist".




KAN?


p/s: entri ini mungkin sarcastic mungkin tidak, bagi kamu yang memang tidak faham sarcasm.

Mari seorang mari semua.

AAAAAA
sebelum pukul 12 malam.
sebelum terlambat.

Saya nak ucapkan selamat hari jadi kepada:


Akak Shammie! Ahahaha. Semoga semua impian tercapai eh. And bilalah kita nak sama-sama menerbit buku cerita ni?

Dan tidak lupa juga kepada Akak Fatin. Semoga cita-cita mu tercapai juga ok.

Sorry lah lambat wish ke apa. Apa-apa pun semoga korang dipanjangkan umur dan dimurahkan rezeki, yo!

Love is a word that cannot stand on its own.

All my life i have lived, i have love.

I still have love.

Faham tak?

I'm not saying i have loved. I said i have love.

Aku mempunyai cinta.

BUt the problem is, i do not have a recipient to whom i want to share my love with.

Itulah masalahnya.

Agak susah jugaklah nak jadi baik ni.

Aku sudah sekian lama tidak beli buku dan juga cd cerita.

Dulu memang tidak sah kalau aku keluar aku tak beli benda-benda alah sebegitu. Sekarang aku sudah tak tahu apa yang aku mahukan.

Kadang-kadang itu, apabila aku dilanda kebosanan yang teramat, dan apabila aku tak tahu nak buat apa, tergerak hati aku mengatakan

"I need some real live porn!"



Damn i'm bored!

This is just a hypothetical post.

Kalaulah aku nak bunuh diri sekalipun, aku dah punyai cukup sebab untuk berbuat demikian.

Aku dah kumpul banyak sebab yang kukuh yang boleh, sekurang-kurangnya buat orang pertimbangkan apa yang aku mahu lakukan itu.

Itupun kalaulah. Walaupun aku tahu bunuh diri dosa besar.

Dan aku bukannya merungut ke apa.

Haih, aku seriously tak suka lah bila tak ada duit ni. UUURGH!

I just watched Underworld: The Rise of the Lycans.

Yesterday i watched Inkheart.

Before that i went to the cinemas for Outlander. Before that was Maut. And before that, They Wait. And Brainscan and so on.

Eventhough i have watched all these movies in the past week or so, like how i used to love doing during my glory days in high school, i still feel empty.

I have lost the love and the desire for everything i used to enjoy.

For example, as you can see, i have disinterest in watching movies. I mean i still go to the cinemas, but i have not enjoyed any of them lately. I feel nothing towards each and any one of the movies i have watched.

Not only that, i have also lost interest in gaming, taking pictures and editing them (which i so much adored), buying new shirt with cool one-liners, reading blogs, making friends and so on and so forth.

If you know me very well, which i guess none of you do, before all this, i was a very friendly person. I loved making friends and i keep in contact with everyone. Everyday i would comment them and pass them little Cadbury chocolates.

But now i just can't even simply reply a text message. The earliest i could reply is in between three to four days, which by then i would feel like it is useless to reply a message that is already a few days old.

I think i am really becoming the epitome of an antisocial. Or perhaps a noob antisocial. Whatever.

But amidst all this antisocialisme, i feel a bit contented. I feel a slight tingle of happiness. I do not know why, but what i know is i am a very lively person and can have fun but sometimes i need to stay home and recharge. Perhaps this is me recharging after a few years being very friendly and all, i just need some "me" time. I guess.

If only psychiatry was not that expensive. If only Freud was not that into the "people are fueled by sexual desires" shit (although sometimes i do agree). If only Carl Jung was still alive. Maybe they could help me out a little. Just a bit.


Kawan: Nanti aku dapat gaji nak beli handphone baru lah kot. Yang baru tuh, ala 3gi1100fyckwhatever tuh. Yang ada 3g 4g dan boleh guna memory 200gb.

Kawan lain: Emm aku nak baju yang ari tuh tuh. Yang cantik gila tuh kat kedai StUPIDIOTs. Sekarang ramai pakai style tuh, aku nak ikut trend itu.

Kawan lain punye lain: Ala korang ni baik beli Bipod. Lagi best. Boleh letak lagu, main game, letak movie tangkap gambar. Lagi power kot. Memory dia dah 1 juta gb dah.

Kawan mana-mana lah: Wei Awan. Kau pula nak beli apa dengan gaji kau?

Don: Aku nak beli buku Watchmen yang sudah lama aku nantikan. Kalau tak ada kat malaysia aku nak beli online jugak.

...silence...


I know, i am really lame. But do i look like i care? Perhaps a little, but suka-fucking-hati aku lah.