Perhaps, perhaps, perhaps.

You won't admit you love me
and so how am i ever to know
you only tell me
perhaps, perhaps, perhaps.

But my perhaps is much more different, i think.

Since the beginning of my high school years i have learnt many things but love is not one of them. I have learnt how to get myself out of sticky-icky situations. I learnt how to charm people. I have learnt how to be alone. But never in my life have i learned how to love or to recognise and acknowledge that love.

Over the past few years, i have the instinct and the intelligence of knowing whether someone has a liking to me or not. I call it talent but what good use a talent if i do not use it to my advantage. Maybe it is because of my innocence or perhaps my kindheartedness. Either one, i have never tried to misused the liking of someone into to do my own bidding.

I also had no talent in accepting and/or replying that likeness to another. I believe in imagination like how i have always said. I don't believe in love at first sight or anything of that matter. Its imagination that makes our lives better. That's another story. What i'm trying to say here is, if a person does like me, i cannot accept that likeness nor can i reply the latter if and only if i do not have the same feelings towards the person. Nor can i say and hint to the person that i do not have the same predisposition towards the person for i have not the courage of breaking someones heart.

Instead i would just rely on my good wits and manners and treat the person with civility and respect. Although i do not think that telling her the truth about my feelings is a respect i should give but nevertheless i am a cowardly lion.

That would still be easy for me.

But staying in the area of the unknown is very disagreeable. I guess i am now feeling what my former admirers are feeling too. Liking someone that cannot or has not accepted and replied the likeness. It is a very sad situation. But then again, there is hope, for i can see the hints and the clues of the same likeness towards me. But it is incumbent of me to forego all my common senses and sweep you away because i have not the most evidential proof. I am the again the cowardly lion.

if only you give me strength and courage to do so. Perhaps, perhaps, perhaps.